Getting Back on the {Writing} Horse


It feels good to be back, sitting here at my desk, typing away on my laptop, getting lost in an afternoon of writing. It just hit me today how much I’ve missed the comfort I was starting to find in this space, and I’m taking that as a sign that I’m ready to get back in the writing saddle.

The past month has been….hmmmm….I’ll use the word “interesting” for lack of something more definitive that can do the experiences of the past 4-6 weeks justice. Things were so “interesting” that it was very easy to fall back out the writing habit. It was easy because so much was going on within and around me that, well….it all seemed too cumbersome to try and explain-at least in the state I was in. Some days I didn’t have words to express how I felt. Some days, things happened so suddenly, change occurred so very rapidly, I barely had time to process and absorb what was going on before the next event came crashing into my life. In a sense, things just started to run together…I guess if I think about it, I just didn’t really have time to breathe, much less time to write meaningful, competent, thoughtful, or just understandable posts. It almost seemed like just when I was getting my writing mojo back, life started to happen in the most unpleasantest of ways, so instead of writing through my experiences, I let life interrupt me. Disrupt a small fraction of peace I had discovered. In essence, except for a post here or there, I let the experiences of the past month or so silence the writer who had been resurrected in me.

I guess I didn’t want to say (ie write) the wrong thing, or publish something I would later regret. To be honest, I’ve been in a pretty volatile emotional & mental space these past weeks, and again, just didn’t know how well that would translate in my writing, so….I just took a step back, I just got off the horse.

But, now that the emotional hurricane has been slowly downgrading over the past week or so and because I started making some constructive changes, I’m finding my writer’s voice speaking loud and clear again. The desire, the urgency I feel to sit down and sprawl words upon paper or clickety-clak out on a keyboard is pressing again.

I recognized this fact about my desire to write when I was 19 and I was reminded of it again this afternoon during my drive home: writing is my method to the madness that is my life. Everybody’s got one-some have fitness, some do some kind of recreational activity, some have a hobby, some see a therapist, some have music, some have religion…everybody’s got some form or maybe multiple forms of dealing with their lives and the peaks & valleys that come with it. Writing is mine. Holding words hostage on paper (or electronically on a document) is my way of processing and just getting outside of my own head sometimes. I love it. I’ve missed it. I’m sad I almost gave up on it again.

It feels so good to be back.

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Getting Back on the {Writing} Horse

  1. Been there. I love the feeling of my fingers hitting the keys of my laptop almost with their own energy and expression. I get that feeling from no other keyboard either. Weird sounding, but its almost like a finger lovemaking…LOL

    GOOD LUCK!

    • HI! You know…my ex used to make such a big deal about using a separate keyboard when I’m working on my laptop and for months I was like, “it’s not that different dude, it’s just a keyboard-the one on Sassy (my laptop) is just fiiinnnne.” He finally bought me one, and I’ve been using it non-stop ever since. I totally agree about the “finger lovemaking”-that’s exactly how good it feels, especially when they really start to fly across the keys, feverishly delivering what’s been stored in your noggin. Love, love, love it.

      so in other words-I totally feel what you’re saying and couldn’t agree more 🙂 thanks for reading!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s